Thursday, July 17, 2014

That’s the thing about pain. It demands to be felt.

I've read the book some while ago and recently saw the movie. To be honest I procrastinated this situation as much as I was able to. The book induced a storm inside me; one that lasted more than I expeted.
The fact that we were running late for the movie changed my state of mind. We got there just in time for the start of the chaos inside me. I often found myself finishing their lines, that's how much soul I put in their story. I cried, a lot. It was hard for me to breath sometimes. I panic and forget how to do this really simple act. I imagined the whole ending scene over and over in my mind. The pain in my chest was so big that somehow I couldn't feel my hands and my ears were deaf. The only things that worked properly were my eyes. I had falls coming out from my eyes. At some point I heard Andreea. She was crying silently and sighing every 3 seconds. It was heart breaking. My eyes were looking just at her. I forgot about the movie. I wanted to hold her hand and tell her that it wasn't real, but something in my conscience stoped me. I really wanted to make her feel better; but I didn't. I guess that's just how I am. I give up, too easly.
But there is one thing that still bothers me. There were two lovers few seats next to me. The woman slept half of the movie, and when the things started to get rough, the guy bursted into tears, loudly,(and is really hard not to listen to a grown up men crying like a baby) and I guess that's what woke her up. At first she was something like "Oh right now one of them is going to die", but in the end she just couldn't walk herself out of that movie theather. I don't understand this woman.

Photos by me. //12.July.2014//

/ / I've been trying to write this post for more than a week now. The words don't seem to feel right for me. / /
//Oh and if anyone wondered what movie was this about; "The Fault In Our Stars"//


  1. It so hard to understand why people don't feel pain in the same way. Almost like an insult.

    / Avy

  2. Wow :-( The pictures are so beautiful btw!


  3. that's the best quote of the movie...
    so weird, I JUST finished watching longer than half an hour ago I was done with the movie...and then I open my browser, start surfing the blogs and find this post... strange...
    I wish I'd read the book before watching the movie, I try to do so every time there's a new book adaption into film... but I don't have the time to read them all..wish I did...oh I wish I had the time to read some more.. anyway, it is a strong story.... I cried a little in some of the last scenes... especially the one where Hazel talks about the pain in the scale from 1 to 10... she graded 9 for the worst physical pain she had experienced and reserved 10 for the one that comes from the heart, from the feelings, from the soul... I know about that A LOT... I always try to explain people how a broken heart hurts incredibly more than a broken bone.... it's unbearable... and yet again I don't know how I'm still "standing"... not quite well, but I'm still around... as they say in the movie "we can live with pain, you just take it"

  4. This story really sounds heartbreaking. I think you wrote it in a beautiful way, very personal and i think it's brave to put this online.
    I really really need to read the book but i just don't know if i actually want to. Scared that i'll collapse just like you did :(

  5. i saw the movie recently as well and i definitely cried a ton :(

    xx fameliquorlove // bloglovin // instagram


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